Where am I going?
What am I doing?
I had the best dream last night, the best. And now I'm awake, to find my world flipped upside down.
My relationships, are so twisted.
I'm tired of it. I don't know what to write. I don't want to write it.
I don't want to cry, because that would be acknowledging it. I just want to be gentle with myself, and I want to protect myself from critical opinions. I'm so tired. Am I at the top of Everest yet? I sure as hell can't turn around. Tried that. Ha. Trying to go back to the old way of living when your going through a spiritual awakening it really painful. What is also painful is holding onto things or people, you're suppose to let go of. I can't say it. I don't want it to be true. Not again. Not this one, why this one, too?
Dear God, please hold me.
I don't want to let go. I want it to work. But I don't want to be dishonest with myself.
I don't want to write. I don't want to talk.
I'm tired of being with someone who doesn't understand. I'm tired to trying to just be ok with him not trying to understand. I'm tired of not feeling appreciated for all the things I do, I'm tired of explaining something that's so special and amazing to me. Only to be misunderstood and told "Your too sesitive" or "here comes the spiritual babble again."
I'm pouring out now, life is good and sweet, so sweet to share, but so sweet to hold for myself, pure.
Kiel; I am going through a spiritual awakening, which involves changing the way I do everything. It means a lot of uncertainty. It means I'm trying things, I don't know what I want, I don't know where I'm going, but I know I want to travel with joy, peace and gratitude. I want to be gentle with myself if every way possible. Right now, you seem so negative and critical. It's too much. I feel like our connection is lost.
I'm not willing to compromise my spirit anymore, which is what it all comes down to.
How do I know? What do I do? How do I keep Kiel in my life, but get away from all the criticism.
The comments, I hate them. They are always coming after me, seeking me out. Get out of my head. Don't wake me up with your manipulation. You take and take, you expect and expect. I can't give what I don't have.
I'm tired of not being recognized for all of the amazingess I'm doing, and all the amazingness I am.
I'm pouring out now, life is good and sweet, so sweet to share, but so sweet to hold for myself, pure.
Kiel; I am going through a spiritual awakening, which involves changing the way I do everything. It means a lot of uncertainty. It means I'm trying things, I don't know what I want, I don't know where I'm going, but I know I want to travel with joy, peace and gratitude. I want to be gentle with myself if every way possible. Right now, you seem so negative and critical. It's too much. I feel like our connection is lost.
I'm not willing to compromise my spirit anymore, which is what it all comes down to.
How do I know? What do I do? How do I keep Kiel in my life, but get away from all the criticism.
The comments, I hate them. They are always coming after me, seeking me out. Get out of my head. Don't wake me up with your manipulation. You take and take, you expect and expect. I can't give what I don't have.
I'm tired of not being recognized for all of the amazingess I'm doing, and all the amazingness I am.
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